A shocking new Time magazine poll finds that 24 percent of Americans believe President Obama is a Muslim. White House officials pointed out that Obama is “obviously a Christian,” having for two decades attended Jeremiah Wright’s Chicago church, Our Lady of Perpetual Race Baiting. Nearly two-thirds of New Yorkers are opposed to the planned Ground [...]

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Tags: archaeologists, Barack Obama, baseball, bias, BP, Brad Childress, Brett Favre, Brian McNamee, British Petroleum, bullfighting, Christian, Congress, Cooperstown, fossil, Gulf Coast, Hall of fame, HGH, home run, human growth hormone, Jeremiah Wright, Joe Mauer, karma, Larry King, Lindsay Lohan, lying, Mecca, Minnesota Twins, Minnesota Vikings, Moveon.org, MSNBC, Muslim, New Orleans Saints, New York Yankees, nudity, oil spill, prayer, prison, Roger Clemens, Spain, sponge, Steroids, Target, Target Field, terrorists, Tom Emmer, Twitter, Yahoo! Sports

1. Roger Clemens Was always more likely to be indicted than inducted. (previous ranking: unranked) 2. Brad Childress Has “no clue.” Just ask his quarterback. (unranked) 3. Barack Obama Prays every day, usually when facing Mecca. (unranked) 4. Bullfighting Much more exciting when the bull is in the stands. (unranked) 5. Eggs A breakfast that’s to die for. [...]

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Tags: Aerosmith, Antonio Cromartie, Barack Obama, baseball, bastards, Brad Childress, Brett Favre, Brian McNamee, bullfighting, Christian, Congress, Cooperstown, Dr. Laura Schlessinger, eggs, Hall of fame, HGH, human growth hormone, Jennifer Aniston, lying, Mecca, mental retardation, migraines, Minnesota Vikings, Muslim, New York Jets, New York Yankees, Percy Harvin, prayer, racist, Roger Clemens, salmonella, Sarah Palin, Spain, Steroids, Steven Tyler, Twitter, Yahoo! Sports, “American Idol”, “Hard Knocks”

Tommy Lasorda enjoyed a 21-year Hall of Fame career as manager of the Los Angeles Dodgers. Some would say his greatest moment came when the Dodgers beat the New York Yankees in the 1981 World Series. Others would point to the Dodgers’ upset of the Oakland A’s in the ’88 Series. And they would all [...]

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Tags: 1981 World Series, 1984, 1988 World Series, Baseball Hall of Fame, Cooperstown, Kurt Bevacqua, Los Angeles Dodgers, New York Yankees, Oakland Athletics, profanity, San Diego Padres, Tommy Lasorda

North Korea says it’s threatening to launch a “sacred war” in response to the latest U.S.-South Korea military exercises. Kim Jong-Il, though, promises to relent if American officials help him snag a high-def copy of “Hannah Montana: The Upskirt.” A Kings of Leon concert in St. Louis was cut short after only three songs Friday [...]

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Tags: "Hannah Montana", "Kate Plus Eight", "Nightline", "sacred war", "The Apprentice", Adolf Hitler, Afghanistan, Alaska, anti-Semite, Baseball Hall of Fame, blood doping, blow, Bon Jovi, BP, British Petroleum, Cocaine, Cooperstown, Donald Trump, Dwight Gooden, excrement, Floyd Landis, Fox News, Gulf Coast, Harry Caray, high-definition, Hollywood, Holocaust, Jews, Johnny Bench, Kate Gosselin, Kim Jong-Il, Kings of Leon, Lance Armstrong, liquid lunch, Mel Gibson, Miley Cyrus upskirt, military exercises, North Korea, oil spill, Oliver Stone, pigeons, rejection, Sarah Palin, South Korea, St. Louis, Taliban, Tony Hayward, toot, Tour de France, United States, war games, whistleblowers, White House, Wikileaks

An Italian exorcist says the recent New York Times report highly critical of Pope Benedict XVI was “prompted by the Devil.” Times officials denied the claim, saying Frank Rich had nothing to do with the story. President Obama touted his health care reforms on Thursday, bragging that nobody had “pulled the plug on Granny.” That’s [...]

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Tags: 1975 World Series, adultery, alcohol, bags fly free, Barack Obama, Baseball Hall of Fame, Bernie Carbo, Boston Red Sox, condoms, Cooperstown, Dallas Stars, death panels, drugs, erectile dysfunction, exorcist, Facebook, Frank Rich, health care reform, Indiana, Italy, Joslyn James, Mike Modano, Mindy McCready, Minnesota North Stars, Minnesota Wild, New York Times, NHL, pedophile scandal, police, Pope Benedict XVI, Rachel Uchitel, retirement, Roger Clemens, sex scandal, Southwest Airlines, Taser, Thailand, Tiger Woods, Twitter, Vanity Fair

They have the look, smell and feel of REAL facts, without all of that cumbersome factuality Al Michaels’ marriage nearly broke up during the 1980s because of his habit of asking “Do you believe in miracles?” during lovemaking. President Obama’s new proposal would extend free health care to more than 6 million uninsured Navi. Tiger [...]

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Tags: "Avatar", "Jersey Shore", 1980 Winter Olympics, 1997, 2004 presidential race, 2008 presidential race, 2010 Winter Olympics, ABC, Al Michaels, Alaska, Barack Obama, Baseball Hall of Fame, battery, caddie, Canada, cheating, Chile, Cooperstown, crack, curling, earthquake, ESPN, George W. Bush, gold medal, Hannah Storm, Hawaii, health care reform, Jim Bunning, John Birch Society, John Daly, John Shuster, Levi Johnston, Lindsey Vonn, lyrics, marriage, Miami, Miracle on Ice, mirror, MTV, Naomi Campbell, Navi, NBC, PGA Tour, plaque, post-traumatic stress disorder, Pro Bowl, reality TV, Rick Reilly, Roger Ebert, Sarah Palin, sex scandal, showering, skiing, Sports Illustrated, Staten Island Ferry, Steve Williams, swimsuit issue, therapy, Tiger Woods, Tony Kornheiser, tsunami, tweating, Twitter, Vancouver, Whitney Houston

Vikings quarterback Brett Favre won’t be on the field on Super Bowl Sunday, but he will be appearing on your TVs in a new ad for … A. Hyundai B. Sears C. Mancrunch.com Favre’s agent Bus Cook, eager to show the pain suffered by his client on behalf of the Vikings in the NFC title [...]

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Tags: "Crazy Heart", "Edge of Darkness", "Glitter in the Air", "Poker Face", "The Blind Side", "Up in the Air", 1998, 1998 World Cup, 2010 Winter Olympics, 2012 presidential race, 3D, 9-11, Academy Awards, advertising, al-Qaeda, Amy Wynalda, Andre Dawson, anti-Semitism, Atlantic City, Barack Obama, Baseball Hall of Fame, Beatles, Best Actor, Best Picture, Bode Miller, Brett Favre, broadcasting, Bryant McKinnie, Bus Cook, Canton, Celine Dion, Chicago, Chicago Cubs, Congress, Cooperstown, Dean Richards, drama queen, ego, Electric Fetus, Eric Holder, Eric Wynalda, ESPN, Fran Tarkenton, Garrison Keillor, George Clooney, gold medals, Grammy Awards, Ground Hog Day, guns, Hyundai, injuries, Jeff Bridges, Jewish, John Harkes, John Miller, Judge Judy, Justice Department, karaoke, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, knee, Las Vegas, Lower Manhattan, mancrunch.com, McDonaldland, Mel Gibson, Minnesota, Minnesota Vikings, Minute Mouse, Montreal Expos, nausea, NFC Championship Game, NFL, O.K. Corral, Oscars, Pele, pink, Powdermilk biscuits, Prairie Home Companion, Punxsutawney Phil, Rahm Emanuel, Ringo Starr, Rip Torn, rodent, Sandra Bullock, Sears, skiing, soccer, Super Bowl XLIV, terrorism, The Loop Now, Twin Cities, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, underwear bomber, Up, Vancouver, Yemen

1. Nick Saban Now he’s a two-time BCS-winning schmuck. (Previous ranking: unranked) 2. Bert Blyleven His Hall of Fame campaign still has a lot of gas. (unranked) 3. Tiger Woods “Not that there’s anything wrong with that!” (2) 4. NBC As we speak, dreaming up new ways to destroy its prime-time and late-night lineups. (unranked) 5. Gilbert Arenas At least [...]

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Tags: Alabama Crimson Tide, Baseball Hall of Fame, BCS Championship Game, Bert Blyleven, Byron Dorgan, Christopher Dodd, Conan O'Brien, Connecticut, Cooperstown, drunk driving, gas, Gilbert Arenas, Jarvaris Crittenton, Jay Leno, Jayson Williams, Jimmy Fallon, John Hirschbeck, Kentucky Fried Chicken, manslaughter, Minnesota Twins, NBA, NBC, New Jersey Nets, Nick Saban, North Dakota, Roberto Alomar, sex scandal, spitting, Texas Longhorns, Tiger Woods, U.S. Senate, Washington Wizards

Tiger Woods, the world’s most famous athlete, issued a statement Sunday saying “I’m human, and I’m not perfect.” In a related development, his wife Elin is also human, not perfect … and very, very pissed. Tiger suffered minor injuries when he drove into a fire hydrant, then a tree early Friday morning. Those injuries paled [...]

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Tags: Angelina Jolie, Australian Masters, Barack Obama, Baseball Hall of Fame, Beer, Christmas, Cooperstown, Elin Nordegren, ex-husband, Florida, Florida Highway Patrol, ghetto, Isleworth, Jennifer Lopez, John Edwards, Las Vegas, Las Vegas Locomotives, Matt Lauer, Minnesota Timberwolves, Nadya Suleman, National Enquirer, NBA, Nike, Nike SQ Dymo, O.J. Simpson, Octomom, Oprah Winfrey, Rachel Uchitel, Roberto Alomar, Scotland, state dinner, SUV, Tareq & Michaele Salahi, Tiger Woods, TMZ, Today, Toronto Blue Jays, United Football League, White House

1. Stephon Marbury Petroleum is his second favorite jelly, behind Smuckers’ mint apple. (Previous ranking: 1)   2. Michael Vick  Sorry. (unranked)   3. Kim Kardashian  Moving on to younger Heisman winners. (unranked)      4. Henry Gates  “As always, whitey now sits in judgment of me.”‘  (unranked)   5. Plaxico Burress  Willing to take a shot at a jury trial. (2)   

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Tags: Brett Favre, Conrad Murray, Cooperstown, Heisman Trophy, Henry Gates, Joe Biden, Joey Buttafuoco, Kim Kardashian, Mary Jo Buttafuoco, Michael Jackson, Michael Vick, Minnesota Vikings, Pete Rose, Plaxico Burress, Reggie Bush, Russia, Stephon Marbury, Vaseline