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28
Feb
Continuing our weekend theme of Olympic themes, we go back to 1988, and the Summer Games of Seoul, South Korea. “One Moment in Time” was written as the theme song of the Games and was performed by soon-to-be-crackhead Whitney Houston. As her recent concert performance in Australia shows, she has no reasonable chance of ever hitting [...]
Tags: "One Moment in Time", 1988 Summer Olympics, 1989, Australia, Bobby Brown, crack, Grammy Awards, Seoul, South Korea, Whitney Houston
27
Feb
Some moments from the 1980 Lake Placid Olympics are burned in our memories forever. The Miracle on Ice. Eric Heiden’s five gold medals. Herb Brooks’ godawful sports coats. Remembered not so much … the official 1980 Winter Olympics theme. Did you forgot there was an official 1980 Winter Olympics theme? Chuck Mangione probably has, too [...]
Tags: "Give It All You Got", 1980 Winter Olympics, Al Michaels, Chuck Mangione, Eric Heiden, Herb Brooks, hockey, Lake Placid, Miracle on Ice, USA, USSR
26
Feb
Canada’s women’s hockey team, after beating the United States for the Olympic gold medal on Thursday night, celebrated out on the ice with beer, champagne and cigars. In other words, it was a typical weekday night for Canada’s women’s hockey team. A leak in the aquarium at the Dubai Mall forced an evacuation of one [...]
Tags: "Pardon the Interruption", 2010 Winter Olympics, advertising, animal rights, aquarium, Asia, Barack Obama, Beer, blather, Brooke Hundley, Brooke Mueller, cafeteria, Canada, captivity, Central Park, champagne, Charlie Sheen, chicken, China, cigars, crack cocaine, crackhead, degradation, Democrats, Dubai Mall, Earth, ESPN, food, gold medal, groping, Hannah Storm, health care reform, interns, Jim Gibbons, Joan Rivers, killer whale, lawsuit, lead, mall, Manhattan, McNuggets, muggers, Nevada, New York, O.J. Simpson, Orca, Orlando, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, PETA, Republicans, SeaWorld, sex, sex scandal, sharks, shopping center, Steve Phillips, theme park, Tiger Woods, Tilikum, Tony Kornheiser, toys, trainer, tree, U.S. curling, United States, waitress, wilding, women's hockey, World Trade Organization, zealots
26
Feb
1. Killer whales Occasionally live up to their name. (Previous ranking: unranked) 2. Jay McGwire His brother’s keeper? Not exactly. (unranked) 3. The health care summit Almost as watchable as regular C-Span. (unranked) 4. Hormel Dome Dogs apparently not classy enough for Target Field. (unranked) 5. Tony Kornheiser At least he dresses his age … unlike Hannah Storm. (6) [...]
Tags: "Greatest Love of All", "Pardon the Interruption", "Zoolander", 2010 Winter Olympics, Alex Rodriguez, Australia, Barack Obama, baseball, Ben Stiller, bodybuilding, book, C-Span, cage match, Canada, crack, Dome Dogs, drug testing, ESPN, Evgeni Nabokov, goaltending, Hannah Storm, health care reform, HGH, hockey, Hormel, human growth hormone, Jay McGwire, Julia Mancuso, killer whales, Lindsey Vonn, Los Angeles Dodgers, Manny Ramirez, Mark McGwire, Metrodome, Minnesota Twins, New York Yankees, Orlando, Owen Wilson, Russia, SeaWorld, skiing, slalom, St. Louis Cardinals, Steroids, suspension, Swiss cheese, Target Field, Tony Kornheiser, Vancouver, Whitney Houston
25
Feb
The Japanese for centuries have used the poetry of haiku to write about beauty and nature. We use it to deeply analyze the Vancouver Winter Olympics … or at least to mock them … SVEN KRAMER “In Dutch” I listen to coach Lane switch costs me gold medal Some day, I kill him BOB COSTAS [...]
Tags: 2010 Winter Olympics, Apolo Ohno, Bode Miller, Bos Costas, brawl, bronze medal, curling, disqualification, drunk, Dutch, Evan Lysacek, Evgeni Plushenko, figure skating, gold medal, groin, groupies, haiku, Japan, John Shuster, Johnny Weir, Lindsey Vonn, luge, Minnesota, NBC, Netherlands, platinum, roses, Scotty Lago, Short track speed skating, skiing, skip, snowboarding, speed skating, Sports Illustrated, Sven Kramer, swimsuit issue, tape delay, TMZ, Vancouver
25
Feb
1. Toyota “Not totally” fixed. (Previous ranking: unranked) 2. Russia No longer considers hockey a medal sport. (unranked) 3. Tiger Woods “Let’s please give the kid a break,” said the 34-year-old’s agent. (1) 4. Charlie Sheen Spends more time in rehab than out of it. (unranked) 5. Jayson Williams Nothing says “I’m sorry” like reading an apology off a sheet [...]
Tags: "Pardon the Interruption", "Two and a Half Men", 2010 Winter Olympics, apology, Australia, bald, Canada, Charlie Sheen, comb-over, crack, crashes, Elin Nordegren, ESPN, eye, giant slalom, Hannah Storm, hot dogs, Jayson Williams, Kansas City Royals, Lindsey Vonn, manslaughter, meat byproducts, NBA, New Jersey Nets, Olympic hockey, poll, rat, rehab, Russia, sex scandal, skiing, Tiger Woods, Tony Kornheiser, Toyota, U.S. Congress, Whitney Houston
24
Feb
University of Mississippi students, hoping to distance the school from its racially intolerant past, have voted overwhelmingly to dump its mascot, which was named … A. Colonel Reb B. Segregation Sam C. Ku Klux Ken Some country music types have produced a catchy new song in honor of this legendary Vikings quarterback. The tune is [...]
Tags: "Pardon the Interruption", "Paul Blart: Mall Cop", "The Ballad of Brett Favre", 2012 presidential race, apology, Atlanta, Australia, Barack Obama, Barry Bonds, baseball, Brett Favre, Catholic schools, Celebrity Cruises, cheating, Chris Berman, Cocaine, Colonel Reb, country music, CPAC, crack, Dick Cheney, drug rehab, Elton John, Eric Cantor, ESPN, eye, facial growth, Fran Tarkenton, France, Germany, Global warming, go-go boots, greenhouse gases, Hank Aaron, Hannah Storm, health care reform, heart attack, hot dogs, House of Representatives, hunting, Jesus Christ, Joe Mauer, John Shuster, Justin Morneau, Kansas City Royals, Ku Klux Ken, Linda Cohn, Lindsay Lohan, Lynn Cheney, Mark McGwire, Marney Gellner, Minnesota Twins, Minnesota Vikings, Mississippi Rebels, nannies, NFL, NHL, nude sledding, Ole Miss, paparazzi, plaid, pole-dancing, preschool, Queen Elizabeth, Republicans, Ron Paul, Sarah Palin, Segregation Sam, sex scandal, Sluggerrr, Social Security, St. Louis Cardinals, Steroids, suicide, Summer Olympics, Tiger Woods, Tommy Kramer, Tony Kornheiser, U.S. curling, underwear, Whitney Houston, William Shakespeare, Willie Mays, Winter Olympics
24
Feb
1. Tiger Woods Slept around no more than, say, his old man. (Previous ranking: 1) 2. Jayson Williams Tearful apology would have been much more effective about eight years ago. (unranked) 3. Dick Cheney His heart couldn’t take more than three seconds of waterboarding. (unranked) 4. Lindsay Lohan “It surprised me” when she fell in love with that Sam [...]
Tags: "Pardon the Interruption", 2010 Winter Olympics, apology, Barack Obama, Brian Westbrook, Canada, Dick Cheney, Earl Woods, Elin Nordegren, ESPN, Hannah Storm, health care reform, heart attack, hot dogs, Jayson Williams, John Daly, Kansas City Royals, LaDainian Tomlinson, lesbian, Lindsay Lohan, manslaughter, Martin Brodeur, NBA, NBC, New Jersey Devils, New Jersey Nets, NFL, NHL, PGA Tour, Philadelphia Eagles, philandering, Roberto Luongo, Sam Ronson, San Diego Chargers, sex scandal, Slix, Sluggerrr, Tiger Woods, Tony Kornheiser, underwear, waterboarding
23
Feb
PGA star John Daly has a new job as an underwear model. He’s featured in a new advertisement for Slix boxer shorts. It’s believed to be the first ad in history that causes your eyes to bleed spontaneously. Longtime friend Notah Begay, who was in the room for Tiger Woods’ TV apology, says the emotions [...]
Tags: "Oprah", 2010 Winter Olympics, advertising, apology, Austin, boxer shorts, Britain, chocolate, Cocaine, drugs, Duluth, Elin Nordegren, Godiva, Heisman Trophy, hero, Internal Revenue Service, IRS, Joe Stack, John Daly, John Shuster, Joseph Andrew Stack, Kevin Smith, Lindsay Lohan, Minnesota Timberwolves, NBA, NFL, NFL combine, Notah Begay, obesity, Oprah Winfrey, PGA, porn stars, rabbit, season tickets, sex scandal, Slix, Southwest Airlines, strippers, tabloid, Tiger Woods, Tim Tebow, U.S. curling, underwear
23
Feb
1. Tiger Woods Looks like a guy who hasn’t gotten any for three months. (Previous ranking: 1) 2. Health care reform Will only cost another trillion, give or take a trillion. (unranked) 3. Martin Brodeur Do you believe in mediocre goaltending? Yes! (unranked) 4. Joslyn James Whose idea was the Carrot Top wig? (2) 5. Steve Williams “Nothing will change,” [...]
Tags: 2010 Winter Olympics, 20th century, Academy Awards, apology, Barack Obama, bronze medal, burlesque, caddie, Canada, Carrot Top, celebacy, Chip Kelly, college football, comedy, dumbass, Elin Nordegren, Facebook, goaltending, goon, health care reform, Jamere Holland, Joslyn James, Kiko Alonso, LaMichael James, Lindsey Vonn, Martin Brodeur, Matt Simms, Mike Bellotti, New Jersey Devils, NHL, Olympic hockey, Oregon Ducks, Oscars, PGA Tour, pornography, Rob Beard, Russia, Saturday Night Live, Scotty Lago, sex addiction, sex scandal, skiing, snowboarding, Steve Williams, Susan Sarandon, Tiger Woods
